Baby's Temper Tantrums

My 10-month-old has a terrible temper. If you try to take something from her or stop her from doing something that might hurt her, she screams until she's red in the face. But when you give in, she's fine. Is there anything I can do to change this? 

Expert Answers

Sandy Bailey, certified family life educator 

Hold her, tell her she'll be okay, and distract her with another activity or object. She'll quickly forget about her complaints.

Babies have an amazing — and often aggravating — ability to make demands. But your baby needs to know that you care about her feelings, even when she expresses them by screaming or flailing her fists. It may look like she's throwing a fit, but she's really seeking reassurance.

As long as you stick with your original decision — for instance, that she can't play with the remote control — no one can accuse you of "giving in." You're just giving her what she needs.

One of the best approaches to tantrums is to avoid them as much as possible. Pay attention to your baby's cues and try to anticipate her desires. You can reduce her frustration even more by giving her a safe place to explore where you won't constantly have to tell her no.

Screaming comes naturally to babies, and you can't force her to keep her temper. Spanking, swatting, and yelling are especially unhelpful. Your baby will only become more unhappy and distressed. If you're feeling angry, it's okay to put her in a safe place, like a play yard, and let her scream and cry until you have a chance to calm down. She can't have everything she wants, but she has to be able to count on you for comfort.